She dialed quickly.
If she was going to, well, date Adam, she was going to have to say things. Things she wasn't used to saying. Things that, with any other guy, might be understood. But things that, with any other guy, probably wouldn't need to be addressed in the first place.
And who knew when Adam was going to ask. It's not like he was... proactive. Flirty? Yes. Forward? Hell yes. Interested in making the first move?
...
Which is why Bianca was hitting send.
She didn't waste a second. When she heard Adam say hello, she hit him full force.
"Look. If we ever have sex, and that's a big if because I'm pretty sure it's something we need to talk about first, I just want to let you know that I'm... creative and shit. And I'm opening the door for conversation. And. You... aren't saying anything, so. I'm gonna hang up right after this, but I just wanted to say that if we did, I would want you to... um. Wear something. And fuck me. And I would." She could see herself in her bedroom mirror. She was bright red. She hadn't blushed at something sexual in years. "Suck you off. And." Her voice got quieter, sharing a secret. "You wouldn't have to wrap. Unless you wanted to."
She paused, feeling slightly dizzy.
"Okay."
She hung up, and immediately regretted it, because the silence in her room after hearing him breathe was suffocating.
"And... we should talk about it. I don't want anything to happen that you're not completely comfortable with. Or that you don't want."
"You do. You make me feel amazing."
"...I don't know how to make you feel good."
She means well. She really does.
"Stop being difficult. I'm just like any other girl -- pretty standard pleasure spots, which you seem to know how to navigate."
"I want to know how to touch you. Cause my experience so far isn't doing me any good."
He's not trying to be difficult. He just. Honesty.
"I'm kinda learning this with you. No one else has... touched me. If there's a guidebook, I don't have it. But you - you have done nothing wrong. I mean it."
Pause.
"I guess it's not exactly like you... um. Explored yourself... much. Either. I mean. Because. Well. Right?"
Stubborn about that. It's important.
"No. No, I really haven't."
Way to reference something we haven't quite played yet
She sighs. "I'm sorry. I don't mean that."
"Just tell me, instead, what would be a bad idea. I see you look worried sometimes, like I'm about to do something wrong. And I might fuck things up if you don't tell me."
"When you get to that point, where it's more obvious I'm not - what I'm supposed to be, it. I just feel awkward. It's not because of you."
"If - it - happens, I probably won't unwrap. I'm just not comfortable with the... overtly feminine things. About myself."
"Does that make sense?"
It actually helps, a little, on some level, that it isn't about her. She should feel guilty. Should work harder to help him. Shouldn't she?
She licks her lips, pretty positive that it's the truth. "I like whatever you like."
No, no, she should not feel guilty. She's giving him a chance - or the time of day, or however you want to say it. That's so much.
This is easier. "I like you. I like the look you get on your face when you tell me to stop looking at you, or to stop flirting with you. I like the way you talk about defiling me. I really, really, really like the way you said you want me to... fuck you, even with it being a 'maybe at some point in the future if.'"
Doesn't help.
"Yeah, well. I. Um. Have homework."